I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
