how can u be prego again
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
