if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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