ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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