Got a toothbrush?
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
