There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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