i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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