some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize