it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
