careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize