We're like a lot better than the average bears
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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