i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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