sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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