see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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