He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize