My nipple is on Facebook.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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