He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
