Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
