we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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