using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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