im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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