uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize