He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Randomize
