I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
