he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize