Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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