Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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