I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
