we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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