sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
