You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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