I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
All the doctor said was why
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize