I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
PANTIES FOUND
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