Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
