At least make sure they are 18
Why
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
your like the ambassador to my penis.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
