that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
