I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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