I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
