I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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