Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
