We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I will be naked everywhere
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
