Just took my morning after pill in the library
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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