I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
