she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
