If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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