she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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