would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
even my farts smell like vagina
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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