he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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