This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
