3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
